Saturday, March 13, 2010

I hate gravity!

I have been so very careful since my surgery! I've been feeling good, getting stronger every day, been walking on ice, driving in horrible, icy, snowy, foggy conditions, and I get taken down by a wet step! I was even going slow....I just don't get it!

This past Tuesday, I fell flat on my rear and proceeded to bump my way down to the bottom (6-7 stairs in all). Instant and severe pain! I immediately thought I had screwed up where I had surgery! Had to have my school Principal drive me to the emergency room, as my neurosurgeon was in the O.R. all day and his co-workers were fully scheduled.

I had a CT scan and it looks like the surgical site is okay. I have bone and soft tissue bruising of my tailbone and "dairy-air" and they found another fracture on my L1 vertebrae! However....they think the fracture is actually an old one that was not caused by this fall - when I go back for a check up they will look at it again.

In other words, I HURT! I am so very tired of pain that I can not escape. Yes, pain pills, ice packs, heating pads, etc. all help - but it never truly goes away. It makes me physically, emotionally tired, and I'm not really "living", but surviving. Add that to the stresses of my job situation, and well, to put it nicely, it stinks!

To make matters even worse, my Middle Schooler's musical is a week away and I have to be at school to get them ready! We have already missed 4 rehearsals due to poor weather and we can not afford to miss anymore. So there's no staying home and recouping for me. I have no assistant, just me.......and to ask for an extension is pretty futile - even given the circumstances.

So - I try and plaster a smile on my face and away I go - praying the entire day to have the strength to put "one toe in front of the other".

I know things could be much, much worse. I am still able to walk, I have a roof over my head, food in the pantry and clothes in the closet - that is more than millions of other people in the world have. So, I should get over my pity party, and be thankful for the things I do have (which I am), but sometimes a girl just needs to vent.

Well, as always, thanks for stopping and putting up with me :)

Please take care! Elizabeth


Vivian said...

I canNOT imagine your frustration at this time. All I can offer are positive thoughts, heartfelt prayers for total recovery from this newest set back, and hopes that your few remaining rehearsal times produce a memorable musical.

Spring will come, the musical will be over, and I totally agree -- things could be much worse.

Positive thoughts streaming your way from a friend -- feel the vibes!

Shirleymac said...

Oh my gosh that must hurt. I fell a couple of years ago on our front steps and bounced down that way. It knocked the breath out of me but thank goodness aside from some bruising I was okay. You, and I, could have broken our backs! I'm very very careful on stairs now. I fractured my tailbone when I was younger, 20ish, boy did that hurt too! Hope you can get some relief somehow with Advil or whatever.